Australia - The Land Down Under

wizardfromoz

Super Moderator
Staff member
Gold Supporter
Credits
6,096


KGIII

Active Member
Credits
1,389
I have an Australia story! Sit down, kids. Grandpa is gonna tell you a story!

Some years ago, I had the chance to visit Australia. I have been there twice, both times because of a lovely lady. The first time, I was there for a month. The second time, I was there for a full six months.

I was way down in Cann River, out off Prince's Highway. The first time, I spent the time in their small community, doing what adults do when they travel across the globe to meet a female. You're nice people, so I won't go into details.

That went well, so I got a longer visa and returned for six months. In the colorful language of the folks in Oz, I rented a ute and we drove from Cann River all the way to the very northernmost tip of Australia, even going into the park and driving up the Telegraph Road. We made it as far as we could. To go any further, we'd have needed a boat.

We then headed west and into Sydney. We stayed there for a while before flying back down south. A few weeks later, I departed back to my own country. While we truly enjoyed each other a great deal, and she was definitely a cutie, we weren't going to be able to make it work. She didn't want to leave her family to move to the US, and I didn't want to live in Australia.

We called it off. She resumed working at the cafe in town. A few weeks later, she was walking to work when a magpie attacked her. I don't know if you folks know much about Australia, but everything wants to kill you. A magpie isn't a very big bird, but they're really defensive. The bird attacked her face, with results bad enough to send her to the hospital and ending with permanent scarring of the face.

I never did see her again, but we still communicate online. I've since married a lovely young wife, many years my junior, but I still keep in touch with my lady friend from Oz. I had a lovely time, once I got accustomed to the danger. Seriously, everything is deadly in Australia.

During our trip up through the continent, she kept pointing out the various flora and fauna - and then telling me the many ways in which it could kill me. Still, I have fond memories of Oz and may someday revisit the fine people who regularly convinced me to drink to excess while surrounded by critters that wanted to end my life.
 

wizardfromoz

Super Moderator
Staff member
Gold Supporter
Credits
6,096
I am appreciative that member @KGIII has complimented Australians on their friendliness and hospitality - I found the same with his countrymen on my only visit to USA, in 1989 :)

With a sizable chunk of the rest of his post, including

...but everything wants to kill you.
Well, let's see?

21 species of venomous snakes
Scorpions
Venomous lizards (Gila Monster)
The Black Widow spider
Bears
Wolves
Predatory cats
Alligators
Sharks, including the Great White (and yes, we have them, too)

Not just in Australia, but the list above is a short list of the USA's dangerous animals.

A country which has a fierce predator, the bald eagle, as its emblem.

And the fastest animal in the world, and fastest predator in the world makes its home in New York City - the Peregrine Falcon.

My point here is not to spark a competition for which country is more dangerous, but rather to say that so very many countries have their dangers, and it is the responsibility of people visiting those countries to be aware of them and take precautions.

Not a lot can be done to avoid an attack by a bird, but each state here has an excellent Parks and Wildlife Service that, if notified, will come along and capture such birds and their mates, and relocate them to safe territory.

Thanks for listening, and apologies to Brian for my being off topic :)

Wizard
 

VP9KS

Well-Known Member
Credits
392
And.....here we go again !!!

View attachment 7338

ULURU....probably one of the most recognisable landmarks in Australia...possibly the world
Uluru, or Ayers Rock, is a massive sandstone monolith in the heart of the Northern Territory’s arid "Red Centre". The nearest large town is Alice Springs, 450km away. Uluru is sacred to indigenous Australians and is thought to have started forming around 550 million years ago. It’s within Uluru-Kata Tjuta National Park, which also includes the 36 red-rock domes of the Kata Tjuta (colloquially “The Olgas”) formation.
Elevation: 863 m

I have been there...it really is quite majestic.View attachment 7338
Beauty, eh?
 

Condobloke

Well-Known Member
Credits
4,576
nah, thats not off topic, Chris ! It just adds to the australianess of this page.

We could devote a few pages to the nasties crawling and walking around the Aust bush and suburban backyards......but that would frighten off the tourist traffic (not that there is any atm with covid 19 and all......
For the most part, the majority of the nasties want to get away from you every bit as much as you want to get away from them.
So the "approach" is to stay away if you can, but if you cant avoid them, stay quiet, and back off. You start waving a rolled up newspaper etc at a funnel web spider and there is only one way it will end.....you in hospital (if you're lucky.)


On the subject of covid 19....interesting article gathered up by friend @wizardfromoz ......just so you people overseas know the full truth about some of the whoppers being circulated about this pandemic.

Now this IS off topic. However....Please, no arguing the toss here about covid 19

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-05-23/coronacheck-covid-19-tests-measles-ebola-cold/12276130

Now we know the ins and outs (pun intended) of KGILL's sex life, we can move on...or up.....whatever......

Australian men sometimes have a passion for overseas women. Mostly Asian it would seem. In my own case I hotly pursued a young lass from the Philippines until she succumbed to my charms. She is now my wife.

Just to alter course a tad...
A New South Wales dog breeder is calling in helicopters and wildlife trackers to capture a runaway maremma that has been missing for more than five months

The helicopter alone, which was sent out twice last week, costs about $1,200 per hour..
 

VP9KS

Well-Known Member
Credits
392
nah, thats not off topic, Chris ! It just adds to the australianess of this page.

We could devote a few pages to the nasties crawling and walking around the Aust bush and suburban backyards......but that would frighten off the tourist traffic (not that there is any atm with covid 19 and all......
For the most part, the majority of the nasties want to get away from you every bit as much as you want to get away from them.
So the "approach" is to stay away if you can, but if you cant avoid them, stay quiet, and back off. You start waving a rolled up newspaper etc at a funnel web spider and there is only one way it will end.....you in hospital (if you're lucky.)


On the subject of covid 19....interesting article gathered up by friend @wizardfromoz ......just so you people overseas know the full truth about some of the whoppers being circulated about this pandemic.

Now this IS off topic. However....Please, no arguing the toss here about covid 19

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-05-23/coronacheck-covid-19-tests-measles-ebola-cold/12276130

Now we know the ins and outs (pun intended) of KGILL's sex life, we can move on...or up.....whatever......

Australian men sometimes have a passion for overseas women. Mostly Asian it would seem. In my own case I hotly pursued a young lass from the Philippines until she succumbed to my charms. She is now my wife.

Just to alter course a tad...
A New South Wales dog breeder is calling in helicopters and wildlife trackers to capture a runaway maremma that has been missing for more than five months

The helicopter alone, which was sent out twice last week, costs about $1,200 per hour..
Yeah, so much BS, so little time, eh mate?
 

Condobloke

Well-Known Member
Credits
4,576
@VP9KS , yes the BS factor is alive and doing well.

There are 25 Million Aussies here and the number who spend their time thinking about solely snakes and spiders etc etc....you could probably count on the fingers of one hand....and still have a few left over.

Aussies are generally a peaceful lot who wont jump into an argument unless it directly affects them....and even then they will attempt to steer clear. To anyones incessant question about snakes , spiders and the like, they will usually utter a bored response like....'yeah...'.(spoken with the aussie drawl) ..and then change the subject to something of more interest.

or......they just might 'spin' the story about spiders etc....maybe by saying...."check your bed before you climb in tonight....the local brown snake has been seen around a bit....and he is shivering just a touch.....so he may head for the warmth of a bed tonight" .......

Do I have your attention, now ??
 

gvisoc

Member
Credits
938
This country is great. I moved to a townhouse north from Sydney, with a big backyard. and I'm proud to host the following:
  1. A Blue Tonge lizard eating the thousands of snails that we have around the driveway
  2. Several lizards of some other random species. They live like everywhere and they're not impressed by us. Whenever I turn the hose, they approach to drink. They even climb my shoes to get through.
  3. Golden orb spiders and small (kind of... like an aussie $0.20 coin) brown garden spiders that usually get into the house and I have to chase them with a bowl and a cardboard sheet to get them back to the lawn.
The above are my forever friends as I haven't seen any roach yet. I hope they are feasting on them. Go, team!!
  1. Butcher Birds preying on the lizards. Handy to not find yourself buried in little lizards every morning I guess.
  2. Kookaburras too, preying on the lizards and on the earthworms
  3. Rainbow lorikeets eating the orange tree's flowers and yelling the cr*p out of us.
  4. Galahs. Noisy cheecky bas**rds.
  5. Kookatoos. Whenever I hear them I my wife always chants "Gondor is under attack!!"
  6. Noisy miners pissed off at the rest of the birds, and being ignored by the rest of the birds. Indignity in their little faces.
  7. A possum mom can be seen at night having a stroll on the fences carrying the baby on the back, not giving a crap about us.
  8. Bees doing their business to give us oranges for next year.
Looking forward to meet more!
 

Condobloke

Well-Known Member
Credits
4,576
Now that is Australia !

Both Democracy and the Environment at work, Daily. Right there.
 
Last edited:

Condobloke

Well-Known Member
Credits
4,576
On a really sad note, Australia's Helen Reddy has passed away, aged 78

The voice of an angel, forever at Peace.



""
Her signature song I Am Woman, which she co-wrote with Ray Burton, was one of three number-one chart toppers and became the anthem of the women's movement.

The performer's acceptance speech at the Grammys ceremony is one of music's memorable moments.

"I'd like to thank God because she makes everything possible," she told the audience.
 

darry1966

Active Member
Credits
1,748

wizardfromoz

Super Moderator
Staff member
Gold Supporter
Credits
6,096

darry1966

Active Member
Credits
1,748
Too true I think only Richard Hadlee had the wood on him sometimes during those times. Otherwise he was a master batsman like Martin Crowe was for us.
 

Condobloke

Well-Known Member
Credits
4,576
pandemic?......well yes, but this Waikerie community driven to host Australia Day event despite pandemic......

12716372-16x9-xlarge.jpg



This is typical of some small towns in Australia
Key Points :
  • Waikerie's Australia Day usually attracts up to 4,000 people every year with half that number coming from outside the town
  • The organising committee says it plans to hold a 2021 event and will accommodate for COVID-19 rules
  • Acoustic music, fireworks and awards are expected to be features of Waikerie's celebrations in 2021
12716372-16x9-xlarge.jpg
 

darry1966

Active Member
Credits
1,748
You know Wiz the eightees was a great for test cricket and one day cricket - with the likes of the Waugh twins, Craig McDermott, David Boon, Allan Border.......
 

f33dm3bits

Gold Member
Gold Supporter
Credits
6,098
pandemic?......well yes, but this Waikerie community driven to host Australia Day event despite pandemic......
I think it's just plain stupid to host these type of events during a pandemic, and total disrespect towards hospital personnel.
 


Staff online

Members online


Latest posts

Top